


i wanna ride my bike with you

by angryham



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Crushes, Fluff, I Will Go Down With This Ship, M/M, Pining, lil james needs a hug, smol james, tol thomas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-29
Updated: 2015-12-29
Packaged: 2018-05-05 19:27:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5387561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angryham/pseuds/angryham
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>James Madison is 142% sure he's hopeless.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i wanna ride my bike with you

**Author's Note:**

> title from Melanie Martinez's "Training Wheels"
> 
> 75% of the Jefferson/Madison tag is kinky smut so I made this

James Madison was at home on Tuesday night. He was supposed to be doing his homework, but his mind was elsewhere. He was listening to the CD for Fiddler on the Roof because him and Jefferson were going to do tech. Every year they switched off for the school musical. This year and freshman year they did tech. Sophomore year they were in the play as minor characters (thank god) and had a nice time. But James was going to be giving everyone cues. This was much more important than studying.

Despite the sweet melodies of poverty in a small jewish community, James's mind wandered. He thought about Thomas. He was thinking about Thomas when something hit his window. He pulled up the blinds and tried to look out the window the best he could without breaking the mesh screen.

"Hey! James! I'm right here!" A familiar voice called.

A strange warmth went through James's body. 

"It's pitch black. I can't see you. "He said, trying to keep a straight face.

"Come on, James! It's cold!" Thomas whined.

"Why are you even here?" James said, trying to sound harsh.

"I want you to come over and study with me." 

James began to laugh.

"You could've just called me!" 

"Well, throwing pebbles is more fun."

"Come inside." James sighed.

~

After an awkward conversation with James's mom about why Thomas was out alone at 7:24 on a Tuesday night, James and Thomas went up to study.

No studying was actually done. They just talked. James liked that. He liked it a lot. More than he would admit. They sat on his bed and talked. Thomas did most of the talking. At one point, the conversation went to girls. James had little to no experience with girls. Suddenly his calender seemed very interesting with its stupid geometric designs. 

"Who do you like? And you aren't allowed to say 'no one!' because I know you must like someone." Thomas said, making sure that 'no one!' was said in a very prissy voice.

James thought for a bit. He knew he had a crush on someone, he could tell from his mood. He just couldn't tell who. Dolley was cute. But he didn't think he liked her. He looked back at Thomas. He was smiling, on the verge of giggling, James probably was making a stupid face. Thomas had a genuinely friendly expression on his face. James thought it was adorable. Then he realized:

Fuck.

He was so gay.

Full homo.

Fuck.

He immediately turned bright red and looked down.

Thomas put his hand on James's knee. "If this is embarrassing, we don't have to talk about it."

"No, it's fine, but it's getting late and I think you should go home." James said, still looking down.

"Okay." Thomas looked down, a little bit hurt.

~

James spent the rest of the night crying and eating pudding.

He made a list of the possible pros of having a crush on his best friend. You could stare at him all the time and he'd think you're just paying attention to what he's saying. You can be around him all the time and it wouldn't be weird. You already follow him on all forms of social media and, because he's your friend, you feel less uncomfortable about cyber-stalking him. He had a chance because Thomas was always talking about cute girls AND boys. To the best of his knowledge, James was a boy.

But no. He had to stop getting his hopes up. He never even considered himself to be gay. He couldn't just, become boy obsessed all of the sudden. But God, he was. Not obsessed with boys in general, just Thomas. It felt so wrong. Maybe if he just told himself he was straight, in the morning he would be head over heels for Dolley. She was a nice, respectable girl. There was nothing wrong with being gay of course. It's just, he wasn't. He never thought himself to be gay. Why now? He just thought he wasn't super horny like most of the other boys in his grade. Who knew if he was super horny now. God, he was a mess.

~

At school he tried to act completely normal and not-gay around Thomas which, unfortunately, wasn't normal-seeming at all. During chem, Thomas showed James a drawing he made, to which James replied, "That looks lovely. No homo."

After class, when Thomas slung his arm around James, James noticed just how tall Thomas was and how warm he was and how he smiled in just a certain way that made James melt. He wanted to cry.

"We still good to study at 5:30?" Thomas asked.

"Umm, yeah." James awkwardly replied.

~

James spent the two and a half hours he had free, fretting over the house. Throw pillows were adjusted multiple times and the magazines were organized alphabetically. James would've vacuumed the entire house but, his mom not only made him stop, but made him talk about why he was attempting to vacuum the wall. Frankly, James hated the wallpaper and was hoping that it would get sucked up but, no such luck.

"Jesus, James. Is a girl coming over?" His mother said while sipping a glass of lemonade.

"No, just Thomas." He replied, still cleaning.

"Same thing." She said, chuckling a little bit.

James looked up from his work and blushed.

James looked at the time. 5:26. He stood and waited by the door. 5:27. He checked his hair. 5:28. He tried to smooth the wrinkles in his shirt. 5:29. He paced the hallway. 5:30. He waited at the door. 5:31. 5:32. 5:33. 5:34. He began to panic. Thomas probably knew that James had a crush on him and he probably was disgusted and proba-

The door swung open. It was Thomas, thank God.

"Hey James! Hey Ms. Madison." He said giving James a hug.

"Hello Thomas!" James' mother said. "I'll leave you to it!"

~

After they had settled with their books and notes in James's bedroom, Thomas began to talk, like usual.

James watched him attentively, letting out an inaudible sigh every now and then. His smile and light. James couldn't compare. He was too short and got sick too often. He also had a really twisted, bawdy sense of humor and his jokes always fell flat. Thomas was so tall and soft and healthy. All of his jokes landed right and he could charm anyone into anything. 

James Madison was 142% sure he was hopeless.

"You're staring." Thomas said with a smile.

"Oh, um, sorry." James said, turning bright red.

Thomas just laughed and continued writing. This went on for a bit. James staring and Thomas pointing it out and then James would get flustered.

James was able to look and do his work at one point. He nodded occasionally to show that he was listening. There was a pause in the conversation so naturally, James looked up at Thomas to make sure everything was okay. 

Fuck.

Fuck.

Thomas was fucking biting his lip.

James turned bright red and started coughing. He awkwardly explained to Thomas that he needed to use the restroom.

After giving himself a mirror pep talk, he went back to his room, only to find thomas being cute again.

"Be straight, Madison. Be straight." He whispered to himself.

"Hey." Thomas said, casually leaning back.

"Um. Hi." James said, sitting back on his edge of the bed. 

Thomas laughed and smiled at James. "You're so cute."

James was about ready to scream something along the lines of "THOMAS YOU FUCKING FUCK BOY FUCK YOU" but decided against it.

There was silence for about five minutes.

"Hey, James." Thomas said.

James turned to look at Thomas. "What do yo-" He was cut off by Thomas, who thought it was a good idea to interrupt James by putting his mouth on his. 

Wait. A. Fricking. Second.

He was being kissed. By his crush.

He wanted to get up and scream but he needed to make this moment last as long as possible.

The kiss felt long and intense. James was in a blurr of color and emotion the entire time. When it was over, James looked away, panting.

"Was I too forward? Sorry. I've just liked you for a very time an-"

It was James's turn to interrupt.

**Author's Note:**

> whats correct punctuation


End file.
